While I was working on her couch, Susan Ellen was watching The View.
She had a list of people she needed to call. They included Mark Wahlberg, a hearing center in Beverly Hills, her mom, and Prince William.
She kept getting distracted by telling her dogs to shut-up every time her housecleaner would put another pile of white sheets into her washer.
Anyway, the ladies on The View broke into their “Hot Topics” discussion and of course, Elizabeth Hasselbeck started saying something about how Hillary Clinton is a hypocrite because she uses tampons or something like that.
Having no social decency, Susan Ellen proceeded to ask me whom I was voting for.
It was at this point of 2008 when I was learning to bite my tongue whenever I told people I was voting for Kucinich.
“I don’t know,” I answered.
“I’m voting for Hillary not for Bam Bam.”
“Who? Oh, Barack Obama?”
“Yeah. I can’t say his name. Anyway, I went to this psychic in the fall and she told me that Iran is going to nuke us if Hillary isn’t president. So I’m voting for Hillary. I don’t want to get nuked so…”
She looked at my condescendingly, as if my personal vote against Clinton would be the reason for nuclear war.
The funny thing is that I went to a liberal arts school and I have heard more ridiculous reasons to vote for a candidate than this.