Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Chapter 35: Susan Ellen Vs. the Sumo Wrestler

I really like the “Day in Pictures” featured on I like using them as my desktop background.

While I was working for Susan Ellen I had this amazing picture of a sumo wrestler as my desktop. When Susan Ellen noticed it, she started dry heaving.

“Ew! That is so gross. He’s so fat!” she exclaimed.

I told her that sumo wrestling is an ancient Japanese art form and I really liked the framing of the photo and the man’s expression. I was not about to say that the only reason the picture was on my desktop was because it was a hilarious picture of a fat man in a diaper.

“Ugh! How could you look at that everyday? I’d want to kill myself,” Susan Ellen said, the next day, after I turned my computer on.

One day, I was showing Susan Ellen how I was dividing up the chapters in the book on my computer. I had a small window up on my computer.

“Can I fix something on your computer?” she asked. I was a bit taken aback. I thought Susan Ellen didn’t know anything about computers. However, if I underestimated her genius in dieting and skincare expertise, maybe I underestimated her regarding her computer skills as well.

I got up from the desk and Susan Ellen took control of my computer. She dragged the window in front of the sumo wrestler’s face and enlarged it to cover his entire body.

“I just can’t look at him,” she said, “He’s grossing me out.”

The next day, I saw another photo on “The Day in Pictures” that I ended up using to replace the Sumo Wrestler.

“Now, that’s a beautiful picture,” Susan Ellen remarked. “Way better than that fat man.”

It was a picture of a smoky orange sky caused by wild fires.

Why had I that as my desktop background? I don’t know, but for my sense of pseudo-irony at the time, Susan Ellen was right. It was way better than that fat man.

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